Couples Therapy in Philadelphia, PA

The decision to start Couples Therapy can be made from a number of different places and it can be pretty vulnerable and intimidating to bring a therapist into your relationship. Because of this, I want you to know that I truly appreciate you sharing your hearts with me. I am committed to honoring your goals, hopes, and wishes for your relationship with genuine acceptance and compassion. 

I welcome all relationship identifications, formations, and stages, and am an LGBTQ+ Affirming Relationship Therapist

Relationships come in all shapes and sizes, and each relationship is unique, because every human is unique. This is what I absolutely love about the work that I do. 

On this page, you’ll find a few reasons couples may decide to start couples therapy, and how it can help. 

Repair, Rebuild or Adjust through Relationship Counseling

Sometimes couples start couples therapy because something significant, like a trust rupture, has happened in the relationship. This experience has caused hurt or pain to one or both partners and they don’t know how to heal, repair, or move through this. Similarly, sometimes couples need support moving through a significant event, period of change, or life adjustment together. They’re not sure how to best support their relationship or each other through this event that may be causing some confusing or difficult interactions or emotions.

In couples therapy, we can create a contained space to share, express, and move through the various emotions connected to the stressor. We’ll work to identify, explore, and practice ways to strengthen or rebuild your relationship. We’ll identify the cycle that you may be getting stuck in that’s getting in the way of shared understanding, connection, or healing, and work on shifting that cycle to strengthen your secure bond together. Ultimately, in doing so, clients tend to say they notice that the hurt, pain, or challenge area no longer overshadows their truest wishes for their relationship.

Communication & Conflict Styles

Sometimes couples find themselves stuck in the same conversation or argument over and over. Despite their most desperate efforts, they can’t seem to find a way out. They might express that they feel like their wires keep getting crossed, like they’re speaking two different languages, or like they just can’t figure out how to be heard or understood by their partner.

We can identify the shared patterns of interaction that are affecting how you and your partner are communicating and relating to each other. We’ll slow things down together in order to break down the barriers to hearing and understanding each other. Through this work, couples tend to begin to communicate and hear each other in new ways that work better for the relationship that they truly want. This can have the potential to lead to increased understandings, improved connection, and more satisfaction and ease in the relationship.

Couples Therapy Can Help Identify External Impacts on the Relationship

Sometimes couples start to notice that their own past experiences or past hurts are affecting their shared present. Maybe trauma or familiar patterns from their history are impacting how they’re currently relating together. They’re not sure how to work beyond this to experience the relationship that they have been wanting. Sometimes couples even notice other factors, like extended family expectations, internal beliefs systems about how things “should” be or feel, or difficulty setting boundaries, are bleeding into how they are feeling together and relating. These challenges are causing a disconnect or strain in the relationship and they don’t know how to change it.

Together, we can begin to identify what is impacting how you and your partner are relating and feeling. We’ll look for opportunities to empower your ability to decide for yourselves how you want to be in relationship together. This could mean practicing boundary setting, or breaking patterns from your history that are no longer serving you. It may also mean fostering the strengths that already exists within your relationship. We seek to discover the version of your relationship that feels most satisfying, fulfilling, and authentic to you.

Prioritize Your Connection Through Couples Counseling

Sometimes couples start to notice that their connection is or has been feeling off or even absent. One or both may be feeling distant or they’re not sure how to get their needs met or meet their partner’s needs. Maybe life just keeps getting in the way and it’s been hard to prioritize the relationship. Their connection isn’t where they’d like it to be or where it once was and they’re not sure how to reconnect or rebuild.

We can prioritize your relationship and the connection you each are wanting. We’ll define connection and begin to identify what is working, what isn’t working, and what has worked in the past. We’ll tune into and strengthen the connection you truly desire in your relationship. Connection looks and feels different for everyone, so we’ll work to put language to your needs, put action to that language, and prioritize the connection that feels best to each of you. Disconnection can also be a result of a negative cycle you keep getting stuck in together. We can identify this pattern and work towards shifting this to enhance your sense of security together and overall feelings of connection in the relationship.

So, generally, what can you expect from couples therapy and marriage counseling?

Couples therapy is a process, and it can come with some ups and downs, and some tough feelings. But through all of that, we can move you to new patterns of communication, connection, and healing. My couples tend to share that they feel more aware of the patterns getting in the way of the relationship they have been hoping for and tend to be feeling more connected and secure in their relationship through our work together. Additionally, they may report that they feel more able to express and share emotions together and even begin to heal and repair from past hurts. 

How we’ll start Relationship Counseling

In our first couples therapy appointments, you can expect us to start with me getting to know you and your relationship. I’ll want to know about each of you as people and about your relationship as a whole. We will meet all together for your first couples therapy appointment, which will be used to get a good initial understanding of areas you feel stuck in, and what you’re hoping for in your relationship.

After that, each of you can expect to participate in an individual session that will be used as an opportunity to share more about yourself and your own history, in addition to your experience of the stuck points in the relationship. The goal of these sessions is to get a deeper understanding of the factors that may be influencing your relationship overall, and what areas we may need to focus more on during our relationship counseling work.

Following these individual sessions, we’ll generally continue with couples therapy sessions with both of you, unless otherwise specified or discussed. This is because when we communicate and share openly together, we are allowing the opportunity to learn, heal, and relate in new ways.

Additionally, you can expect to set some goals together in our first few sessions. I’ll make sure I know what you really want to get out of our work together. I know that sometimes it’s not easy to identify what our goals are, so if you’re not sure we can figure that out together. Our work together will generally be a process of unpacking and identifying your relationship patterns, opening up about emotions and experiences, and practicing new styles of communication and conflict resolution that feel better to you. 

You and your partner deserve the relationship you want, and we can create and discover that in our work together.

If you’re ready to get started, I’d love to meet you!

My Approach to Relationship Counseling  

Curious about what approach, theory, or model I use? I have a master’s degree in marriage and family therapy, and blend this systemic training with a collaborative and client-centered style, utilizing an Emotionally Focused Therapy lens in my work with couples. What does that mean? You can read more about my approach, education, and training here.

Marriage Counseling and Couples Therapy in Philadelphia, PA

Clarity Together Counseling offers relationship counseling in Philadelphia and across the state of Pennsylvania via a HIPAA compliant, secure, telehealth platform.